11 Things Learned Having Served in the US Navy

and (could) apply to life outside

Photo by Danielle Rice on Unsplash

1. Get smarter or get stronger. Oftentimes when we made a mistake, particularly early in the career in training or school, we were made to do pushups, squats, whatever. So.. strengthen your mind or your body was going to get stronger. I hated this when I was going through it. But now that I have some experience under my belt I think it’s a great motivator. And either way, you’re benefitting. Ideally, you should be both smart AND strong.

2. Always be learning. You have a lot of downtime. Carry a book with you. Nowadays you can download the Kindle app on your phone, carry a book, or buy an e-reader (highly recommended because you can have hundreds of books at your fingertips). No need to worry about space for tons of actual books. Plus you aren’t distracted by your phone.

3. "Soft" skills are just as important as technical and intellectual ability. Books on psychology or emotional intelligence or, the dirty word "leadership" will help you ¹. People are hard to lead anywhere you go. People are both the best and often the worst part of any job (see item #11). Everybody has different styles of communicating, behaving, responding, listening, talking, understanding. If you can't adapt how you communicate, then how can you expect others to do the same? Speakers and writers are taught that you have to know your audience. You have to know what makes them respond, motivated, etc. This comes with experience, and from reading books by people smarter than you on these subjects. Someone can be the best at their job but if they are an asshole then nobody will listen or follow them. When it comes to working with and managing people, “one-size-fits-all” is a non-existent ideal. You have to engage in your own education because most of the leadership techniques taught in a formal setting is bullshit. This is grossly overlooked in the military, and I am sure the same applies in the private sector.

4. Be flexible and adaptable. The only sure constant is change. Sometimes we knew what would happen on our day-to-day mission. Other days we didn't. We had to be ready for anything. On the ship when weather got bad, my job required everyone hurry back to the work center to take positions. It didn't matter what you were doing: gym, napping, reading, laundry, in the shower. You had to return. After everyone arrived we let people go who needed to, got food for those on position. You had to constantly stay on your toes. You got into the mindset to always be ready. And that caused us to look at everything we did differently.

5. You're either good for the military, or the military is good for you. (Replace the word “military” with whatever job or corporation you work). This is something an old friend of mine told me around my four-year-mark. It always stuck with me. I have found that the people in the first group will be good in any venture in which choose to belong. They hustle and work hard, and treat everyone as a part of a team. The people in the second group are the opposite. The military gives them a path to follow, and it’s pretty hard to screw it up. They can do the bare minimum and they’ll still get paid. There’s nothing inherently wrong with this, but they will have a difficult time creating more autonomy for themselves if they choose this path.

6. You get paid in more ways beside money. I mentioned autonomy in the previous section. To me, that’s the best form of currency. To do what you have to do without anyone on your back. You get paid in autonomy when you do a good job, are reliable, and communicate well up and down the chain. The second best form of payment is off-time. Off-time (or “liberty” as we call it) is a prized commodity in an organization such as the military because every paygrade is paid the same. If you are aware of this then it should direct you to work harder and smarter. The person of paygrade X who does Y amount of work will get paid the same as another person of paygrade X who does Y^10 amount of work. Good leaders know this and reward those deserving. There are other ways we get paid, but these are the two biggest to me.

7. You are both somebody and nobody at the same time. You have the ability to make a difference. Some people think you just need to follow directions and do what you are told. That is sometimes but not always true. You are rewarded for innovative, outside-the-box thinking. If you have good ideas and you know how to communicate them then you will have influence. You can be successful and help others do the same. Pull people up with you, don’t step on them just to propel yourself forward (unless they are assholes). You have to know when to speak up and make moves. That said- all of this can be suddenly taken away. You are replaceable. You could get hit by an ice cream truck on the way to work and they'll have your replacement next week. This means to regulate yourself properly and augment your thinking to the finite nature of everything. It could end at any time, so do the best you can while you’re here.

8. Keep yourself grounded. There’s a shelf-life to the military. Hell, there’s a shelf-life to every corporate or private venture. Investing in your own education will allow you to see other possibilities that other’s can’t see. There’s no “one way”. Your life is your life. There are both subjective and objective truths. Use every opportunity you can to learn something from someone else. Knowing the kind of person you DON’T want to be is just as important as knowing who you DO want to be. Always keep one foot on the shore and the other in the boat. When you do this and the time comes to jump ship (it will always come) you’ll already be running in that direction and your future won’t be so bleak.

9. Shit, shower, shave. Self-explanatory. Don’t be a stinky shitbag.

10. Take care of your body. The natural atrophy of our bodies are a constant for every human being. There used to be plenty of physical training in the military, and some branches and specific military communities still have it, but it’s not emphasized like it used to be. I would argue that we have to do our best to take care of ourselves. You have only one body, and that body is the vehicle which has physically experienced everything in your life, from when you were a kid to the present. Fight to make this a priority. There will always be an excuse as to why you didn’t/ can’t work out. You don’t have to train to be a cross-fit athlete. Keep your heart healthy, do some resistance training, eat well 80% of the time. Even if you have just five minutes, see how many pushups you can do within that time. That’s a helluva workout for anyone. If you don’t take care of your body, it won’t take care of you when you need it most.

11. Be a student of people. Like I said before, people are both the best and worst part of anything you do. The quality of your life at any point in time is almost always the quality of your relationships at that time. Not everyone is a good person or has the best intentions. Some try to ruin everything for everyone. You have to be aware of this. There will be toxic people. Stay the hell away from these people. When I was a million miles away from home the people I worked with were my family. We did everything together. Laughed, joked, fought, slept in close quarters, showered, ate paella in foreign ports where we didn’t know the language, worked long nights, had midnight meals in the galley after an impossibly long day of flight operations in the middle of the scorching-hot Arabian Gulf. Movie-marathon nights, shared care-package goodies, celebrated birthdays, mourned deaths. The more you invest in relationships, the more you try to understand people (even the dickheads.. especially the dickheads), the more you will learn about yourself and the better you will be. I will forget a lot of the dumb bullshit I had to do in the military, but I will never forget the people.

Below: Picture I took of my dad at the tail-end of the maiden deployment of the USS Bush, December 2011.

1. I’ve always disliked the word “leadership”. I have been trying to find a replacement for this word. It’s talked about as if it’s a position. Like you can read a pamphlet then you’ve got it. Not everyone is a leader, and for good reason. You have an opportunity to lead no matter what your role or position is within an organization. There’s always a discussion of manager vs. boss vs. leader. Leadership is an art as much as it’s a science, and practicing art is a lifelong endeavor.